At the Christmas Eve service- My father played and Alycia sang their own special version of Jesus Loves Me. I knew it was coming—but the words—“Little ones to Him belong, they are weak but He is strong” shook me to the core—our son may be weak in the world’s eyes—but strong arms hold him. My mother's were holding me as the sobs started.....
I think of Mary—and how hard it must have been for her to have this baby—knowing that he would have to die. She had to completely trust in something she did not see and not fully comprehend. But her heart response- “I am the Lord’s servant, may it be done to me as you have said.”- Luke 1: 38
Lord give us the strength to respond in such a way as Mary.
Emmanuel—meaning “God with us”—was again taking on a different meaning this Christmas. I know salvation. I know Jesus. I know with certainty where I am going after I die. I have known this for years and continue to find great comfort in it. I am eternally thankful for Christ-- but this year, as I face death in a new way, I am grateful in a completely different way. My son and I will be reunited one day in the most beautiful and perfect place. Death is not something to be feared, but something that I can look at with hope. This is possible because Jesus made the choice to trust His father and love the unlovable. Thank you God for the gift of your Son—so that you can save mine.
Benaiah,
ReplyDeleteGrowing up with all females in one household, and to top it off with even a female cat- one could only imagine the pointless drama and sporadic chaos that would quickly arise from the depths of the raging hormones, hairspray clouds, and tampax wrappers.
Growing up with my two beautiful sisters, I couldn't help but always wonder what the world would be like if we had a brother. Aside from all of the sparkly dance costumes to barbie dolls to the color pink to "cooties" I have always had a curiosity of "what it would be like"
I think about what would have been different if we had a brother. I think about what we would have done. I envision scenes like fishing, flag football, digging for worms, and exploring the great outdoors. Although I would not change a thing from my childhood, I have always wanted to know "what it would be like"
When Tara told us the news about your arrival, I don’t think you could put into words what was felt that day within our family; from tears of excitement, joy, and surprise to jaws hitting the floor, to a "naughty" wink to Brad. This is a day that will never be forgotten. As the weeks passed, your "Benaiah bump" finally started to show- it was then it became real.
After reality setting in and seeing the excitement and anticipation of your arrival grow; As if I were back in my childhood, I started wondering "what it would be like" to have a brother. I envisioned things like taking you fishing, playing flag football, digging for worms, and exploring the great outdoors.
I have waited this long to wonder "what it would be like" to have a brother. Although I may not be able to spend time with you and do the all of these things I envision right now, through the grace and strength of our loving Christ, even though I may have to wait a little longer, I do promise you this, I will know "what it would be like" to have a brother...